I have come to realize over the last year that these seven cardinal rules of life are a roadmap to an amazing and happy life. Once I really started to implement them, my mindset completely changed, and I was no longer a negative person. It was very much a turning point in my life, and a wonderful one. I could not have done anything better for myself than changing my mindset by implementing these into my life.
Make peace with the past. I can’t change the past. It’s done and over. I’ve made peace with it, and I’ve moved on. If someone else wants to hang on to it, that is their problem. If they want that negative mindset, they can keep it. Hanging onto the past ruins the present. The present is just that. A gift. Think of it like that. We can’t change the past, we can’t predict the future because it isn’t guaranteed. But the present is a gift we should be cherishing, enjoying, and be grateful for.
What others think of you is none of your business. You know what they say about opinions? Yeah, so that is basically how I approach that one. I don’t need to know what others think about me. Because they may have walked into a part of my life that wasn’t good, without context, and are judging it with limited information. Again, not my problem. There is a theme here. People grow and change all the time. That is the beauty of being a human. Evolving into something great as we gain experience. Someone may be judging who they think I was a year ago, five years ago, whatever. They know nothing about me now.
Time heals almost everything. This really is true. Time changes who we are, our thoughts on things, and our experiences. I think many times we are not nearly patient enough with ourselves in this regard. I know I am not. Too many times we give ourselves a timeline of how we are supposed to deal with things and magically be done with it. It doesn’t work that way. Slow down and be patient, time will heal you.
No one is in charge of your happiness but you. This was a game changer for me when I started to really understand this. I’m not even kidding. It was the most amazing thing I’ve ever come to realize and understand in my lifetime. I mean, I’ve heard it a million times over the years, but the day I decided to take control of my life was the best day of my life. You know the phrase, ‘today is the first day of the rest of your life?’ Yeah, the day I made my happiness my priority really changed me.
Sometimes taking charge of our own happiness is not a pretty journey. Because people will fight you the entire way, trying to keep control over you. The phrase ‘haters will hate’ applies here. Great. Let them hate. You know where those people belong? Far, far away. Feel free to hate, but keep it away from me, is how I look at it. Sometimes that requires removing people from our lives because we find out they are haters and not supporters. It is painful, but refer back to this rule. We are in charge of our happiness.
If anyone stands in your way of happiness, make them go away. It is literally that simple. Surround yourself with people who want to lift you up and support you. As soon as you remove the haters, the difference becomes noticeable. I’m not saying you want blind followers who agree with everything you say or do. That is narcisstic. But remember that there is a huge difference between haters and those who are willing to give you honest feedback because they care about you. Pay attention, and it will become easy to see the difference.
Don’t compare yourself to others. I will never understand why people do this. Life is not a race. We’re all in it together, and nobody is getting out alive anyway. Why turn it into a competition? My favorite person on the planet once told me something, and it has stuck with me since then. Everybody has to start somewhere.
The context in this was in regards to weight lifting, but little did he know that became my motto about life. Everybody has to start somewhere. That is why I say that life isn’t a race or a competition. There’s no handbook to how we go about each of our lives. The other thing here is that we don’t know the journey of others and what it took for them to get where they are now.
Don’t judge a story you don’t know. Don’t judge a chapter of that story that you walked into in the middle of either. We never know what someone else is going through. People don’t know what we’re going through. It’s not anyone’s business, really. You what is though? Kindness. Which is something the world needs more of. Just be kind.
Stop overthinking. I can’t stress this one enough. Especially since I am the queen of overthinking. I have a crown to prove it. Although I’ve taken it off since I changed my mindset here. I have been on a journey not to overthink absolutely everything. Because it is ok not to have all the answers. Have you ever known anyone to have all the answers? Yeah, me neither. All that overthinking does is take away the joy of the present, and who wants that?
I refer back to the part about no one being in charge of my happiness expect me here. Because overthinking takes away from my happiness, and that means it needs to change. Life never goes the way I planned it anyway. When have you known that to happen? I want to meet the person who has predicted the future accurately. Because it just doesn’t happen that way. Relax, enjoy the ride, and learn from the experiences. Life never turns out the way we planned, but it turns out exactly the way it was meant to. Trust the process.
Smile genuinely and love completely. I feel like this is something we all should focus on. How often do you smile in a day? My guess is not nearly enough. I know I’ve been there. But you know what? It feels incredible just to smile. I find I relax a bit more when I do, and I am happy. The world isn’t nearly as terrible as it seems. I don’t own the world’s problems, and neither do you. Smile genuinely and often, and love completely too. There isn’t nearly enough of this happening in the world.
I find when I smile, I am very much in that moment. Not worried about everything going on around me, problems, or anything else. Just take the time to focus on that moment and the joy in it. Love like you’ve never been hurt before. I feel like we deny ourselves and others so much love because we are always worried about being hurt again. Let go of that worry and allow yourself to love completely. You’ll find it is absolutely amazing.
Understanding these simple things and implementing them into my life has been amazing. Literally one of the best choices I’ve ever made. Simply because I have found I have a far more positive outlook on life and things are less stressful.
That doesn’t mean things are magically perfect. It simply means I have healthier coping mechanisms and can handle it far better than before. I don’t know about anyone else, but I appreciate that! A positive mindset is an amazing first step in turning life around to be better. I encourage everyone to do that.